Falling in Love With a Serial Killer

Ted Bundy, one of the most notorious serial killers in American history, was sentenced to death in 1979 for the murder of two college students. In 1980 a separate trial saw Bundy convicted and sentenced to death for the rape and murder of 12-year-old Kimberly Dianne Leach. Bundy confessed to 28 murders and may have been responsible for countless more.

Carole Ann Boone married Bundy in 1980, in the courtroom during his trial for the murder of Leach. Two years later, Boone gave birth to Bundy’s daughter.

To most people, the idea of being in a romantic relationship with an admitted murderer or violent offender is completely insane. Yet Boone wasn’t the only woman interested in Bundy after he was captured and exposed as an inhuman killer; he allegedly had hundreds of female admirers writing to him.

More perplexingly, Bundy isn’t the only example of a serial killer attracting legions of female fans. Richard Ramirez, also known as the Night Stalker, killed at least 13 people in California between 1984-1985 and expressed no remorse for doing so. In 1996, seven years after his conviction, he married magazine editor Doreen Lioy.

Your first thought when facing all of this information is probably “… but why?” And that’s a fair question with not a lot of great answers.

But it may have something to do with hybristophilia.

What Is Hybristophilia?

Hybristophilia is a sexual attraction to criminals, usually criminals guilty of extremely disturbing and violent crimes. While it’s most often applied to relationships with serial killers, it can be applied to romantic interest for any violent offender.

There haven’t been any formal studies about hybristophilia, presumably due to a lack of adequate sample size. Whatever information we can glean is based on anecdotal evidence and psychological observations. However, there is enough to make some educated guesses.

In these scenarios, it is almost uniformly women who seek out male criminals or serial killers - for reasons researchers haven’t fully explored, hybristophilia is less common in men.

Perhaps this is due in part to the fact that women interested in violent felons and serial killers in custody have a great deal of power and control in their relationships. Their chosen partner has to be on his best behavior at all times, otherwise the woman could just walk away. The women know where their men are at all times; they can’t unexpectedly drop by or sneak off with someone else. Plus there’s none of the trials and tribulations that stem from actually living with your partner.

There are other elements to hybristophilia. Serial killers frequently display high levels of personal charisma to help them cover their tracks and waylay suspicion. Such charisma might attract partners, even when facing the evidence of their crimes.

Additionally, the women involved with serial killers may be motivated by a desire for notoriety, novelty, and secondary fame. Others may have extremely misguided empathy for the killers. Famously, Doreen Lioy spent years arguing in public that Ramirez was innocent. In many cases, the women attracted to serial killers have a history of being abused physically or emotionally and thus struggle with low self-esteem.

Can Anything Break the Spell?

Because we don’t know that much about hybristophilia, it’s hard to know how to help the women ensnared by it.

There is some evidence that eventually, women involved with murderous men will snap out of their romantic fantasies on their own. Carole Ann Boone divorced Bundy in 1986, three years before his execution. Reports suggest that Doreen Lioy hadn’t seen her husband for years before his death from cancer in 2013, although it is unclear whether they ever officially separated.

Such a phenomenon surely deserves more rigorous study.

References: Why Are Some Women Sexually Attracted to Serial Killers? | Why Some Women Are Attracted To Serial Killers Like Charles Manson | There’s Actually A Reason Why So Many Women Were Obsessed With Ted Bundy | Ted Bundy: American serial killer | Meet Carole Ann Boone, The Woman Who Fell In Love With Ted Bundy And Had His Child While He Was On Death Row | Richard Ramirez: American serial killer | Doreen Lioy, The Seemingly Normal Woman Who Became Richard Ramirez’s Wife